Friday, September 14, 2007

Not So Much

Woman calling boss: You won't see me today
Boss: Why?
Woman: I'm not feeling very well.
Boss: Why? What's wrong?
Woman: I have a case of anal glaucoma
Boss: What the heck is anal glaucoma?
Woman: I can't see my ass coming in to work today.

Admittedly, I spilled a biggle (baby giggle) when I heard this joke.
Mom bracketed the telling with "tell me what you think" in a tone that signaled her stance. She was not amused, in fact she found the joke offensive. She has glaucoma and has daily fears of waking without her eyesight. This fear exists for me as well. I'm saddled with poor eyesight, which has deteriorated over the years. I've feared, since getting my first pair of glasses at a very young age, that one day corrective lenses would not suffice. It is totally within the realm of possibilities that glaucoma is in my future. Yet, a biggle did spill.

Resolved, the joke is not split your sides, shoot soda through your nose, spiggable funny. It doesn't have the succulent tartness of knock, knock's "or-an-ge you glad I'm not a banana" but baby giggle worthiness is evident. Or is it? Granted I wasn't offended but I can see how my mom could have been. I thought that the woman who told my mom this joke may have flashed a dash of insensitivity.

Which is how I left it with mom.

Speaking of knock, knock, enjoy the great rack!
Cheers! x 3 to all my fantasy footballers! Rack Up Those Stats!



15 comments:

  1. You duped a totally gullible me with that rack.

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  2. This post made me biggle. :)

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  3. Now that rack is something you can hang your ________ on. BOL

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  4. I confess, a biggle did escape around the edge of my coffee cup. I've worn glasses since age 7, with the same fears. They are now about as thick as coke bottle lenses. Still, it would be fun to tell my boss that some morning when calling in sick!

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  5. Ah. I can't see myself going in to teach this week.....

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  6. Loved the joke - has just the amount of sarcasm I like. I've also been wearing glasses since 7, now I'm wearing bi-focals. I feel sometimes you just got to laugh at your troubles...or else you'd cry.

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  7. Anonymous3:33 PM

    Benign Neutrality is an excellent diplomatic policy to employ when communicating with mothers. Well done, friend!

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  8. Never heard the joke before - it provoked a smile.

    The rack provoked another.

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  9. Anonymous9:34 AM

    Yeah, jokes are a hard call...not really sure if it will go over with the audience.

    Although that joke there was giggle/groan worthy.

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  10. Nothing like a great rack - I wonder what it's doing Saturday night?

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  11. What is up with the 2-0 start in fantasy football? At least the sporks aren't playing you this week!

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  12. 2-0 start? eh, I chalk it up to beginner's luck--in the extreme.

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  13. Anonymous3:59 PM

    That one reminds me of the old one that goes something like:

    Me: I can't come in today due to illness and fatigue.

    Boss: Illness and fatigue?

    Me: Yeah, I'm sick and tired of my job.

    Badump bump

    You might want to advise hahn that the rack is not shopping for bras Saturday night...

    I love a great rack.

    My partner built us a nice one, too.

    Holds all our...er...appliances.

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