Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Time Gone By, Slowly

As usual I’ve had a difficult time adjusting to life after Neta. This time made more difficult by the fact that she was here, in my space(s). Gracing them, for sure, while she was here, haunting them now that she’s gone.

I only thought I knew how she felt when I was doing the leaving.

Her laughter, my very favorite of her sounds, resonates throughout. Her hair (the thought of it) tickles my nose at night. Her scent lingeres on pillowcases I’ve been reluctant to launder.

It’s been hard.

One might think that M’s relationship issues, crazy shit at work, mom’s concerns about the social security administration being out to get her, D’s not-having a-car woes, my own on-going battle with weight-fullness, killer cramps, slightly throbbing knees and an oddly painful right heel would keep me occupied enough, keep my mind from wandering back to the void, would keep me from losing every thought except this: Neta was here and now she isn't.


If you think any of that has kept my mind off missing her royally, think again.

8 comments:

  1. No words, just a hug.

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  2. TOD i am so sorry its taken me so long to get back over here since your visit with Neta. i know exactly what you speak of. i watched it happen to gina at the end of my visit there. she experienced the same empty noiseless void that she had never noticed before my visit.

    Our situations are... hard, they are just hard.

    (((hugs)))
    neen

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  3. Only one way to solve that problem.

    C'mon, I did it! Follow ME! :)

    (HUG)

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  4. Is there any end in sight? That would make this situation more bearable, at least.

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  5. So one must ask, who's moving? And how soon?

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  6. I hear ya Deborah, I hear ya.
    Hugs my friend!!

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  7. Your true and deep love is comforting to know of, though, thank you for sharing it.

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  8. yeah, what max asked... when's the move?

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