Sunday, June 20, 2010

No Celebration

As long as the stars shine down from the heavens
As long as the rivers run to the sea
I'll never get over you getting over me *

The day started as so many others. I rose a tad sluggish but felt energized after a shower and hot coffee. Prepped and dressed with some pep in my step, I head to the train, picking up a RedEye , deciding I wasn't in the mood for the book currently in my bag, along the way.
The RedEye, with its brief spin on the news of the previous day, entertainment tid-bits, human interest items, devotion to photos, puzzles, and games is light and fluffy enough for my short commute. My usual routine is to thumb through the beginning on the way to the puzzles. Now and again, an article or feature, that I hadn't already read on-line, catches my eye.
Now and again happened on Friday. Kyra's column catches my eye. As I begin to read emotion I hadn't realized I was still harboring over my own father, and quite possibly all fathers, my kid's, my brother, an uncle hear and there, all the fathers who missed the memo on what being a father meant spilled out of my eyes. And wouldn't stop. I couldn't rein it in the entire way to my stop and even on the short walk to the office building.

As I read about lessons taught, traditions upheld, and times treasured I couldn't help but think about lost opportunity, wisdom, and tranquility.

Not to mention companionship.

One of the reasons I'm drawn to USA network's "In Plain Sight" is due to the portrayal of Mary Shannon's (played by Mary McCormack) relationship with her absentee father. She is resigned to his absence while be haunted by his abandonment. And though she has the resources at her disposal to look for him, she refuses. I think the fear of what she'd find in him is greater than the desire to have him back in her life.

My dad rarely crosses my mind, but it is clear from my reactions to other tributes, that he remains embedded and likely always will be.

*Expose: I'll Never Get Over


  1. Anonymous11:37 AM

    yay for cathartic blogging...sounds like you are on the quiet road of resolution...sometimes it just is...


  2. I think it can be very healing when something unexpected cuts your emotions off at the knees and starts the water works. Hope you are all better now...

  3. It's easier to forgive the mf's after they die.

    Mine was my mother.

    Wrap your arms around you & let your inner 'GOOD DADDY' come out & love you.

  4. Relationships continue to grow and evolve looooong after they seem 'done with.' I hope for you the path widens and you find peace.


Hi! Your visit is much appreciated.