Thursday, July 18, 2013


We've been making the trip to the train station every work day, except on "interview" days. I really miss seeing her sparkly carriage when I disembark from the "EL" on those days, having to face the long (okay, not too long, but long enough) walk home, especially in my hard soled shoes.

I go to bed Friday nights feeling like we'll rise early Saturday morning to go cruising along the Illinois Prairie Path for a mile or two (or better?) But so far, we haven't risen early (enough) and we haven't ventured further than the library or the 1/2 mile to our local market for yogurt and juice or . . . something (probably toilet paper).

This Saturday is the family picnic. The picnic site is twenty some miles away. So, of course no bicycling this Saturday--at least not early. Perhaps post-return, post-nap. Perhaps.

Melody, I know is chomping at the bit to test her mettle, stretch some muscles, get some air in her hair.

But I'm not there yet. I'm trying to be, in fact, thought I was . . . but, no. Not yet.

Soon, though.

I think. I hope. I must.

She's waiting, patiently.

☮ and ♥  

Friday, July 05, 2013


Some days I feel like I can be the star of "The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl" while on others, I feel like a totally in control "Wonder Woman." Mostly, middle-aged, mother of two (adults) with two cats and a dog, working for a living.

I wrote the above passage some months ago as part of an introduction for entry into another meet-up group. I got in the group but have not participated in any meet-ups. There haven't been many and the few, so far, have been during the workweek, lunch-time, networking meetings. Which I would do if not for the pesky "day" job. 

Which may not be an issue in a couple of weeks. Before I could tender my resignation, I was let go. Officially, laid off, downsized. Wednesday was to have been my last day. Except NOW the owner / boss terminated the person who was going to assume many of my duties. I've been asked to and am expected to "hang around" to "help out" until . . .  

However, all of exploits of the last couple of weeks aren't even the point of this post. The point of THIS post: my feelings of inadequacy, my lack of confidence, my overall sense that I have absolutely no idea how best to fashion my résumé prepare myself for interviews, position myself to compete against the twenty and thirty-somethings out there looking for work. 

I'm trying to affect a positive attitude, a high-energy approach to the research, writing, and building toward the next life. But, it is taking everything I have and then some. The "Awkward Black Girl" is hanging about my shoulders much more than "Wonder Woman" these days. 

In totally unrelated news, I've decided to go to the family picnic in spite of the tent revival meeting atmosphere alluded to in the invitation / fee request. 

**I think I missed the opportunity to officially join the challenge (yet another example of being "off" my game) but I will produce 75 sketches within 75 days. I'm behind a few so some will be double, triple up days.