I’m a Lesbian. I’m a lesbian. I’m a lesbian. I’m a lesbian. I AM A L E S B I A N.
Surprised? No, of course you’re not. I came out…here on my blog, after coming out to my son and daughter. Those who know me from the blog and the few who have met me in person have only known me as such. (Oh, there were a few months where my status was…not specified, but it was such a short time, it is nearly forgotten).
I came out here. I “dated” on-line and told you some of those tales. I met and dated seriously for nearly two years my lady love and told you some of those tales. I AM A LESBIAN.
That IS my identity here.
That IS my identity in my home I’m a lesbian.
But, beyond that, my status is . . . not specified.
I’ve been feeling the need to put a face on my lesbian status, to give that status a live, in real-time, voice. I’ve been feeling the need to let those who know me as otherwise, know my truth and nothing but the truth.
I am emboldened by my reading, blogging, support of those who’ve commented (& subsequent emails) not to mention, the fantastic support of the lovely ladies I’ve met face-to-face. And certainly knowing and loving Neta has provided yet another level to that courage. But, having had zero connection to any facet of “the family” here in my own backyard, so to speak, on that level I feel . . . alone.
(Note to QM: IF mom had asked, I would have answered, truthfully, honestly).
You’re probably saying, “But Deborah, you are so strong, so confident, so lesbian”, how could this be?
I FEEL strong, confident and certainly lesbian, especially here, on-line. I also FEEL strong, confident and certainly lesbian when I’m in like company. But, as I said, I have had zero connection to any facet of “the family” here in my corner of the world.
In a sense, I am alone. And, I’m basically shy.
However, to remedy that alone feeling I’ve scurried up the gumption to attend a Women Like Me meeting at our local GLBT Association, this past weekend.
There, I met 13 women, like me who are married, separated, divorced and/or coming OUT later in life. Thirteen women who are all working to give real-time voice to their truth and to live that truth, openly, honestly and in every corner of their lives.
One of the 13 women I met at the meeting is a woman I’d met before under other circumstances. She is in her fifties and has just come out to her husband and children. She and I met through D, who is not aware of this woman’s truth. She asked me not to reveal as she’s not quite ready.
I understood. I agreed. I am no longer alone.
And soon enough I’ll be living openly, honestly in every corner of my world.